Fears

You know, it’s probably a terrible idea to list my phobias and fears out for the internet to see. BUT I’M GOING TO DO IT. Because I like making bad decisions. They’re fun. And most of my phobias are probably hard to recreate unless I’m actually a Sim, in which case… I’m probably already destined for some bad times.

Anyway. Everyone’s afraid of something, aren’t they? If they’re not, I’d like to meet them, because they must be exceedingly brave. …Or they’re a sociopath, in which case, mmm maybe not.

Some of my fears are serious, some are silly, and some are fairly bizarre.

Find a happy place, find a happy place!

Find a happy place, find a happy place!

1.Driving in the snow
Maybe it’s the feeling of my car wanting to end my life prematurely. Maybe it was the time my mom and I saw a tractor-trailer jackknife and flip over on the highway in front of us. I get really freaked out about driving on icy, snowy roads. Which is why I terribly would like to live either a place where I don’t have to drive or one where I don’t have to deal with winter.

2. Jellyfish
Bleah. Oh gosh. I can’t even think about jellyfish too much. I’m always tempted to fast-forward through that section of Finding Nemo. They’re just gross and look like they shouldn’t exist and then there are the really deadly ones in Australia. But then again, pretty much everything is deadly in Australia. I live in fear of going in the ocean and having one brush up against my leg with its feelers. Something about them is really squelchy and icky, just like the word…

3. Moist
I just shuddered typing that and hearing it in my head. Ugh. Let’s move on. 

4. Being trapped/stuck somewhere
My nightmares all follow a common theme, ever since I was little. Generally I’m stuck in some sort of dystopian world and can’t escape, or I’m lost and kind find my way out. When I was little, there was one nightmare where an evil witch destroyed my home and so my family was moving to a new home but I couldn’t find them or keep up. A funny variation on this nightmare was during high school, I dreamt that my best friend’s mom thought I was my friend and locked me in a pantry and wouldn’t let me out. (Don’t ask). But this translates to real life too. I don’t like being stuck, physically or metaphorically.

5. Obesity
No, I’m not afraid of fat people. I’m afraid of succumbing to the average American prototype. So I work out like a hamster on a wheel. I find exercise to be restorative, both mentally and physically, but I also am afraid of the possibility becoming so unhealthy that my quality of life is impacted. When I think about how sedentary my life is as a grownup, I get itchy and need to go run off some steam. 

6. Dummies/ventriloquist dolls
Or any sort of uncanny valley type toy too. My brother was given a furby one year when we were little. I dismantled that vassal of Satan and locked it up in a trunk AND IT STILL MADE NOISE AND GIGGLED TO ITSELF. Pure evil, man. Stuff of nightmares. 

7. Space
No, seriously. I’m really afraid of space. I like it on a conceptual level. I love Star Wars and Doctor Who and Futurama. But… the people who first signed up to be astronauts had to be some crazy, crazy people. Beyond that, thinking about space in any seriousness overwhelms my brain, especially the whole sun exploding bit, and gives me an existential crisis for a while. Then I need to usually distract myself with Tumblr. 

8. Mediocrity/banality
The immortal enemy of any perfectionist. 

9. Gunk in the sink
Oh my god. I can’t. That’s the one chore I can’t do. I have done some pretty gross things. I have cleaned up a friend’s vomit, plunged toilets, changed diapers, collected dog urine to test it for ketones, unclogged my college bathroom shower (clogged with someone else’s hair, no less). But I cannot, cannot deal with bits of old food in the sink. Especially, like in my house, where people put utensils that have pet food still on them in the sink without rinsing them. Omg. A clogged sink is my nightmare. 

10. Daddy Long-Legs
They disturb me on a deep, emotional level. Like jellyfish, they also seem like they shouldn’t exist. Honestly, I don’t care about your regular variety of spiders, but daddy long-legs are just wrong. They’re like orange floating dots with spindly lines for legs and they move and they want to kill you but they can’t because our skin is too thick. Creepy little buggers.

Anyway. Now that I’ve listed my most bizarre fears, I need to go watch videos of pugs or turtles eating strawberries to get these visions out of my mind.

Love always,
Gabriele

Advertisements

9 thoughts on “Fears

  1. 1. Good grief Gabriele! Be careful in that weather! I know the feeling…I flipped my car on black ice last year and totaled it! I’m not much for winter either being from the South.
    3. You are the not the first woman I have heard say they don’t like the “M” word. Oddly, no one is really sure why they don’t like it.
    4. I also have this fear hence why I would never go on a cruise. I think it is the feeling of hopelessness and being out of control that bothers me.
    5. I also fear obesity. I think it is mainly from being told for so long that I was fat, disgusting, and that no woman would ever love me while I was growing up, that it became a motivation tool to begin working out. The silver lining is that I developed a real passion for it and like you, use it as a way to escape the real world.
    6. I have also heard others mention this about the Furby. That’s downright terrifying and creepy.
    7. Maybe space goes back to the fear of being trapped or lost somewhere.
    8. Ditto. I could have not have said it better myself.

    I think my biggest fear is failure. I’ve had such a difficult time dealing with instances where things did not work out the way I wanted to. I really admire people who have the mindset to immediately put negative things behind them and move forward. I envy that and have been working hard to adapt a similar mindset.

    • We’re supposed to get another foot of snow tomorrow! Not fun. Oh, me too! I also have no inclination to ever go on a cruise. They freak me out, being stuck on the water like that. And if I was going on a trip, I think I’d want to explore a new place, rather than sit on a giant boat. Hmmm… space could definitely connect to my fear of being lost. And Furbys are plotting to take over the world… it’s going to happen. All must be prepared for the Furby-apocalypse.

      I definitely worry a lot about failure too. But it’s in human nature to succeed and fail. We can’t have one without the other. I remind myself how people like JK Rowling got rejected from multiple publishing houses. We have to fall, in order to rise up! (Of course, being that optimistic is easier said than done)

  2. I think that you fears are reasonable! I absolutely hate the snow unless there is a purpose for it, like snow tubing or snow sports. But if I need to get from point A to point B, I hate it. Jellyfish are absolutely bizarre. I don’t understand them. I just know that I was with my brother in law when he got stung once and the lifeguard had my brother in law pee on his arm…not only is a jelly fish terrifying, but that’s disgusting. Also Furby’s are like the devil coming to terrify children. WHY. WHY DO FURBY’S EXIST? And Daddy Long Legs are probably the worst spider. Unless you are in Australia and there are spiders here that will actually kill you, then Daddy Long Legs don’t seem so annoying!

    But I love that you shared your fears! Many people share similar views and fears too.

    • Oh my gosh! That’s a crazy story about your brother-in-law. I actually misread that at first as the lifeguard peeing on his arm… so glad I read that wrong. Furby’s are terrible. I suspect whoever invented them wanted to take over the world.

      And gosh…. I don’t know how Australians survive Australia. I’ve seen documentaries on their crazy big spiders and vicious jellyfish. And dingos steal babies?! (That one might be a myth). Stay safe haha

      • I agree with you that the Furby creator wanted to take over the world. Apparently they are more terrifying now too. An au pair I’ve met here said that her child she watches has one and it went from happy to incredible angry within seconds that it was literally like the devil was coming. She had to completely restart the entire system. No child’s toy should ever do that!

        And I’ve actually never heard of the Dingo’s stealing babies, clearly I’m living under a rock! But I found this article interesting that doesn’t necessarily disprove it! http://mentalfloss.com/article/27993/would-dingo-really-eat-your-baby

        But yeah there are two spiders that if you get bit you can die or get something amputated depending on how fast the venom travels and then there are also multiple snakes. I was told that if I ever get bitten by a spider just to call the emergency hot line and don’t try to figure out if it was poisonous or not. Luckily, my family hasn’t seen any around this area!

      • Ugh… how can things made for children be so creepy?! Whenever I see pictures of old-timey toys, those look really frightening and not made for children too.

        Ah, good ol’Mental Floss answering life’s important questions! Keep your au-pair kids away from them haha.

        Yikes… That’s crazy about the spiders! Is your family in a city, suburbs, or rural area? Hopefully there isn’t anything too bad for you to worry about. I’ve heard horror stories!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s